It's coming to the end of the year

...and it's that time again to make new (or unfulfilled) resolutions.

So, here are my resolutions for 2010:

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1. to secure my first deal for my new company

2. to get myself a blackberry (ONLY if I successfully fulfill resolution #1)

3. to wean Renee off breastmilk...hahaha!

4. to try for baby #2

5. to save as much moo-lah as possible (hubby will probably laugh his head off when he reads this)

6. to unpack all my boxes on my upstairs landing

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So, wish me luck...

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On another note....

I really have no idea what's going on through her mind but my maid told us that she's 'setengah gila'. Yes. She did. Last night.

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I was so numb I didn't know how to react so I continued eating my lobak.

But hubby hit the ceiling.

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So, it's end of the year and everyone's happy and I'm stuck with a maid who's half crazy.

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This is my life.

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Happy New Year, everyone!

Chris & Shandy

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

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My little baby cousin Chris got married yesterday and it was a huge affair!

Nissan Skyline as the wedding car, followed by a Ferrari, and BMW Z4, and so many other fancy cars I don't even know....the guys at the wedding had a great time oogling the pretty cars, the pretty girls and the even more gorgeous bride.

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Me?

I was too busy running after Renee that I didn't even have time to eat.

Such luck huh.

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So, now that Godma's children are all married, it's mummy's children next.

Well, I'm off the list.

Next comes Jodie and Sarah.

Hmmm....

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It was my first time to 'yum cha' yesterday and I was so excited!

My next time would be when Cuz Doug and Jane gets married in 2011.

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Some relatives asked me, in between no chance to yum cha?

And I replied. "Well, Sarah's still so young. So definitely 2nd time will be Doug's wedding"

They asked back, "What about Jodie?"

And I said, "Aiyah, I think I drink Renee's tea also belum drink Jodie's tea lah!"

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

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Unless YOU would like to prove me wrong *grin*

It's Christmas time

It's the first Christmas we're celebrating in our own home this year and it's so exciting!

Buying our own tree, putting up decorations in our own humble abode....

So I started asking around where Christmas trees are cheap.

Some told me I could get a 5" tree for RM200.

Some said RM350 for a 6" one.

And hubby even suggested a LIVE tree from IKEA, for only RM149 and it includes FREE delivery too.

But I was thinking, where the hell am I going to put the LIVE tree inside my house?

Cos what's the use of getting a Christmas tree if I had to put it outside in the garden right?

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In the end, I found out that Petaling Street sold Christmas decors at a terribly fantastic price, so off we trooped down one weekend.

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I got my 5" tree for ONLY RM35.90!

Party or what?!

So I happily came home and started putting up the tree.

I totally forgot about the fact that I had a little anak yang sungguh terror.

Each time I tried to put up the decor on the tree.

She reached up and pulled it back down.

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caught red-handed!

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It took me so long to put up the tree, I almost gave up and just give her all the balls to play with.

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My theme this year....

...red and silver

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Next year, I'm going for blue and brown.

SO NICE!

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I went back to Petaling Street the following week and bought even more decorations.

I so feel like Mrs. Claus now!

CritiQue

It's OUT!!!

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I guess for it's first issue, it's not too bad la, except that I still don't get why they had to choose who they did for the front cover. Not really one of my favs. And not a very good move especially for the very first issue, y'know what I mean. Oh well...

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It doesn't really come across as a lifestyle magazine though.

I feel that the colours aren't bright enough, everything's like gray and white - BORING.

Looks more like The Edge than a lifestyle magazine.

But it's new and I'm sure they'll improve as more and more issues are out.

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I should have submitted a nicer picture of myself though.

This one looks terribly awful!

I look mad.

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My very own article!!!

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So remember, first two issues are free and are available at all Coffee Beans!

Go pick yours up today....

Of dead fishes, cute dogs, singing maid and CRITIQUE!!!

Last week, I bought Renee a fighting fish.

It died last night.

And I didn't even have time to take a picture of it =(

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Today, I went to the pet store nearby to see if I could get Renee another one.

They don't sell fishes there.

But I saw this one dog. So OMG cuuuuuuute!!!

It's a grey and white miniature chi-hwa-hwa.

Only 2 months plus old.

Female.

Going for ONLY RM980!!!

I soooooooooo soooooooooooo soooooooooooooo absolutely wanna get it!!!

But will have to discuss with hubby first.

And hubby sure say "NO!" wan =(

But still, if I don't try, I won't know.

So....*fingers crossed*....

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My maid is singing in an irritating high-pitched voice to Renee right now.

Indonesian songs.

And it's annoying me to the very core of my bones.

Should I stop her?

But I don't want her to feel like she can't even sing to Renee.

And not like she knows any English rhymes.

Imagine her singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star is super high-pitched Indon slang mewling noise.

But it IS irritating me.

So how? What to do?

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On another note, CRITIQUE will be out in Coffee Beans from tomorrow onwards!!!

The first 2 issues are free but it will be available in news-stands nationwide from Jan '10 onwards.

Be sure to grab your free copy when you see it cos yours truly here has her very own FOOD column in it.

It's a monthly magazine, so watch out for my monthly gastronomic adventures...I promise you nothing but PURE fun!!!

The river that wanted to be a pond

Before we bought this place, we asked the developer if the river flowing in front will flood should there be days of continuous rain and they very confidently GUARANTEED that it wouldn't flood at all. In fact, I quote "The river was built to PREVENT floods".

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see, we have water-trees

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Well, last week, I had to rush off to SJMC for some private & confidential reasons (PLEASE DON'T ASK MY WHY) and after spending the whole afternoon there, I came home to find this!

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even the walkway is down under

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My river has turned into a POND!!!

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Wtf guarantee no flood river to prevent flood nonsense??!!!

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It wasn't even raining like for the whole morning and afternoon lorr. It was only raining cats & dogs for like less than 3 hours, and the river went over the brim.

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that's the bench I always sit on to cut Renee's nails...it's a water-bench now

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Can you imagine what I would have come home to if it rained the whole morning and afternoon??? I would have come home to NOTHING. My home would be gone! Flowed away with the currents on the flood prevention river.

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Hubby called the developers and fucked them up upside down inside out and you know what was their measly reply??? "We are discussing how to overcome this problem now".

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Wah, by the time you're done discussing, I'll have my very own indoor swimming

pool lorr.

MURDER!

Did anyone read the news about a baby's head found in the trash, body missing, suspected to have been mauled or eaten by dogs?

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http://nst.com.my/articles/20091102193958/Article/

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Gosh! I am so bloody angry with the person who did that to their own child! I won't even refer to her as the 'mother' because no mothers in this world would do that to their own baby!

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I wonder how you felt when you saw the news about YOUR baby's head being found in the dump, body missing because it was eaten by dogs.

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For your good, you better seriously hope to hell that the baby was already dead before the dogs ripped it apart, cause when you're in hell (which is DEFINITELY where you'll be going), you would want to be dead too before your head is ripped apart by huge savage beasts over and over and over and over again.

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But if baby wasn't dead yet and instead was shivering in the cold, starving, surrounded by smelly stinky garbage, being bitten little by little by red ants, totally defenseless, before finally having the dogs come and end it's misery in a snap WITH a snap, I curse you to the MOST TRAGIC DEATH EVER!

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Not that I don't already curse you, you sick excuse for a woman, but I curse you such a tragic death that you will feel it even after when you're in hell. I hope your body rots away slowly but surely, and each piece that rots away causes you extremely excruciating pain that no amount of painkillers can cure and you can't even kill yourself to escape the pain. And when you finally do succumb to death, it will happen all over again. And each time the process repeats itself, it will be a hundred times worse than before.

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Hmph! See how you like throwing away your baby just like that again!

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I seriously don't get it lorr.

I mean, I understand if you're scared or something, but then, during the throes of passion, never think arr? Never occurred to you that this is something that COULD happen meh? Even contraceptions are only 99% safe. And then, when you do get pregnant, instead of being responsible, you KILL your child, the MOST INNOCENT life in the picture.

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Where's the logic in that???!!!

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And even if the baby was a result of you getting raped, you shouldn't take out your anger on the baby lorr. The least you could do was put the baby at someone's doorstep, and then run and hide and keep a watch until you know the baby is in safe hands.

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So stupid!

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No matter how educated or well-brought up a person is, the minute she does something like that, be it throwing your baby in the garbage, or leaving the baby at the side of the road, or even abortion, you are NOTHING. You are worse than nothing.

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URGH!!! I TOTALLY HATE....FUCKING HATE....PEOPLE LIKE THAT!

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I don't know how you can go on with life after doing something like that to your own child, how you can continue living everyday pretending that you never committed a murder.

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But one thing I DO know, you won't have an easy time on judgement day, THAT'S FOR SURE!

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***

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Okay.....B.R.E.A.T.H.E.........

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Anyways, there's something weird happening to me. The whole right side of my body, from waist downwards, is aching in places here and there. My right hip bone when I bend. My right knee when I kneel. My right ankle when I walk. Hell, there's even an ulcer on the right side of my tongue.

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Now how weird is that.

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What's happening? This is so scary.

It's like I really getting old.

Sigh...some things even I just can't deny.

I had a dream, a song to sing...

Last night, I had a dream.

In it, I was holding my precious second child.

She was beautiful.

Thick black hair and huge dark eyes (totally opposite from my first born).

And....she had a name...

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We called her...

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...Cadence...

Someone flirted with me

Went to upgrade the software on my Maxis Broadband yesterday in Pyramid and the guy that serviced me FLIRTED with me!

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Since I've given birth to Renee, I haven't gone anywhere without her so naturally, people knew that I was married and that I was already a mum.

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But last night, hubby was at Fridays with Renee and so, I was alone when I walked into the Maxis shop.

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The guy was already smiling at me even before I got to his counter but he was polite enough to proceed according to procedure, asking me the right questions until he got to the part about payment method.

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"Oh, no worries about that, it's autodebit from my husband's credit card"

"You're married???!!!" he stares at me with shock, hands in sudden pause motion above his keypad.

"Erm...yes, I am. Is that a problem?"

"You don't look married. Are you sure you're married?"

"Yes, I'm very sure. I even have a daughter"

"How OLD are you? You look so young!"

"Old enough to be your mother"

"But you MUST be only 24??!!!"

"Well, no, I'm actually 30"

"Aiseh, then no chance dy lah...."

"Excuse me???"

There was a pause. Then...

"...aiyah, nevermind la, I still give you my number. Any problems, you can call me personally"

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***

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Bought this from Diva and am totally in love with it.

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It can be used as a bracelet...

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...and anklet....

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...and even a necklace!

LOVE LOVE!

And the best thing, it's so soft that I can wear it and STILL carry Renee without feeling uncomfortable or anything.

My little fussy eater

Renee's been acting really weird the pass few days. She's not eating as much as she used to. In fact, she's hardly eating at all.

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Usually, she finishes a whole bowl of porridge/rice and has second helpings even. The pass few days though, she's been taking in only like 3 - 4 spoonfulls of whatever it is I'm feeding her, and then she starts screaming, or pushing the spoon away, or fidgeting in her chair. She just refuses to eat.

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So, at first, I thought maybe she isn't hungry.

But the minute I take the bowl away, she demands for biscuits.

And she can eat up to 10 pieces of biscuits in a go. Just like that.

So how could that mean that she isn't hungry, right?

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And this went on for 2 days and so I decided enough is enough.

Afterall, she cannot be just eating biscuits and nothing else.

And what kind of mummy would I be if I allowed this to continue?

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So today, when she started her nonsense again, I refused to give in to her and I forced the food down her throat. She started screaming and crying but I held down both her arms with one hand, and forced her mouth open with the spoonful of whatever I was feeding her with with the other.

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Her tears and mucus and whateverelse body fluids that could come out of her came out and spilt into her bowl but I still continued scooping and feeding, scooping and feeding, scooping and feeding. In the end, she finished the entire bowl and that was when I released her arms and took her off her high-chair.

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And I had to do this like at both lunch and dinner time.

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I felt so bad, seeing her crying and screaming but I just had to make her finish her food instead of just getting full on biscuits.

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Is this considered child abuse?

Sigh....

I'm trying to be the best mummy I can be but sometimes, she makes it so hard for me.

Fashion on you, Fashion on me

A whole load of 'paid-for' merchandise came in the post for me yesterday and I was so excited! I've been waiting like forever for package number 1 to arrive and about a week for package number 2 and they both arrived on the same day so it was like a double-happy-clappy day for me.

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Package No. 1

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My Dell Inspiron Mini 10v in Passion Purple!

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It's a super sleek 10 inch netbook and it's so small that I can practically pop it into my handbag and carry it around with me everywhere I go.

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Of course, I'll be totally unsociable and a bore to hang out with now that I don't need you to entertain me anymore. I've got a new Mini to entertain myself with! (Okay, that sounded wrong).

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I chose a cool purple color but decided that I didn't like all my finger prints being plastered all over it, so......

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.....I 'zing-ed' it!

Doesn't it look absolutely cool now?!

Love!

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Package No. 2

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My purchase from BaciBoutique.

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One pair of skinny, super skinny, ripped jeans....in white.

And I'm totally in love with it because...I don't know....I just love it! It fits me just nice, like a second skin and I absolutely love the ripped out parts because it gives such a rough edge to the whole look.

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I also bought the retro looking tank/dress top because it was so RETRO!

And since mummy bought me like so many colorful leggings from London, I needed more long tops to go with them and this was just right. Love the whole black and white theme going on.

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It's a bit lose for me though, so I'd need to either wear a tube top inside, or a funkier bra. Whichever. Hahaha! I don't care. I love it still.

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By the way, can anyone spot my daughter in the two pictures above?

*Hint* She was digging through my drawer of undergarments.

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Hung out at Pearly's last Friday and she made these DEEEEEELICIOUS cuppacakes for me. Absolutely yummy, not too sweet and the texture was just perfect.

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So, anyone interested, do let me know and I'll pass on the good news to her.

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And yes, Pearly, am doing free advertising for you *winks*

A Day out

So, there was this one day when hubby and I decided to bring Renee to the zoo. Yah, I know right. Like the zoo? But anyways, we went, thinking that maybe it was a public holiday and it was Raya, that everyone would be out of town, like back in their own hometown, you know.

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I should have known better.

In fact, I should have read all the signs that pointed to impending doom the minute we started our journey.

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The first sign. The Fillet-O-Fish we bought from the McD's drive-through on PLUS highway. I opened the box, looking forward to sinking my teeth down into the yummy warm burger, feeling the melted cheese wrap itself onto my upper jaw, but this was what I got.

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HALF of my 'warm, melted cheese' was STUCK onto the damn box.

Like HALF!!!

And tried as I could to dig it up, it just wouldn't.

So stupid.

I cannot believe that idiot McD workers don't even know how to slap a cheese on a bun properly. It doesn't take a genius to do it.

Even a cock-eyed person can do it.

I don't even know what kind of people McD's have working for them.

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Sheesh!

So THAT itself spoilt the start of my day.

And the burger wasn't even delicious.

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The second sign was the wrong turn hubby took and we had to make a HUGE-ASS circle around the whole of KL before getting back onto the right track. I should have asked him to just go straight home.

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The third sign.

The THRONG of people crowded at the entrance to the zoo.

The THRONG of cars crowded at the entrance of the entrance to the zoo.

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Sigh...

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Stupid stupid stupid.

Should have just gone home.

Save the RM45 entrance tickets for something better.

But nooooo, I was adamant on showing Renee the giraffes.

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...and the camels...

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...and the bears, and orangutans and what not.

In the end, she saw the giraffes. And the elephants. And the bears, orangutans, camels, flamingos, deers, kangaroos, lions, tigers....

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She fell asleep the minute we got to the monkey cages. Which was only a QUARTER of the zoo, by the way.

And missed out on the sea-lions performance. And the reptiles section. And the aquarium section. She didn't even get to see her favourite horses.

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So much for bringing her to the zoo and paying RM45 for entrance tickets.

Even my maid wasn't impressed with the way our 'national' zoo looked.

The animals all looked half-starved and depressed.

The were huge signs telling people NOT TO FEED the animals but you could still see everyone throwing popcorn and bread at the animals.

It's just so sad that Malaysians are so stupid. They don't know how to read. Or maybe, they're just blind.

But ALL of them? Blind?

I'm so thankful my parents brought me up well and taught me how to read.

Because I think my family was the MOST CIVILIZED and intelligent people at the zoo.

1# We didn't push and shove

2# We didn't feed the animals

3# We aren't blind

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But seriously, everyone at the zoo were pretty much uneducated.

Feeding pop-corn to bears for heaven's sake!

How much more stupid can one get?!

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At the lions' and tigers' enclosement, there was a wide stretch of river to seperate the animals from the railings where people stand to stare. Hubby asked me if the water was deep enough to keep the animals at a safe distance from the people.

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I stared at him and said, "Looking at the way people here are behaving, I think the reason for the water is not to keep the animals away from the people, but more for PROTECTING the animals from the people".

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After all, which idiot would jump in and swim across to take a closer look?

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In the end, we spent only about an hour - an hour and a half (at the most) at the zoo.

We ain't going back.

I'm not neglecting you, I just don't know what to do

Oh dear, and here I thought that with a new blog, I'd be a bit more 'rajin' in updating. Looks like my new blog is being neglected as well.

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To be honest, I have loads of things to blog about. Tonnes of them.

But if only I was allowed to.

Most of them are personal.

And not being able to talk about it to anyone, or even to blog about it in my own site, is eating me alive.

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What's the use of having a blog then right?

If I can't even use it to vent out my own frustrations.

Lost

It feels like as if I lost 2 people in the pass few days.

My Yeh-Yeh is definitely gone and there's nothing we can do to bring him back.

But I know deep down inside he's very much happier wherever he is because he no longer has to listen to Mama rant and nag and moan and groan about the whole world to him from morning till night.

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The 2nd person I feel like I've lost is not dead.

In fact, he's in China.

And will only be there for a year.

And yet, I still feel a deep lost.

And I don't know why.

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*Sigh*

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You know, I've got this cousin that's really stupid.

On the day of Yeh-Yeh's cremation, after everything was done and we were about to leave, he came up to me and told me this.

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Him: You know, Amy (his wife) can feel all these supernatural things and she told me that Yeh-Yeh is feeling very hot.

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Me: Hello, he was cremated. Of course he's hot!

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Damn stupid right.

Bye-Bye

September 11th, 2009.
Friday.
Aged 85.
Leaving behind a wife.
2 sons, 2 daughters.
2 daughter-in-laws, 2 son-in-laws.
5 grandsons, 6 grand-daughters.
2 great-grand-daughters, 1 great-grandson.
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We'll miss you greatly.

Fraser's Hill

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Cool, fresh air.
Birds chirping in the morning, crickets singing in the night.
Deep silence after midnight.
Cool sunlight dancing in your hair.
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A place where life is relaxed and slow.
Total opposite of the city life that we're all used to.
A place where my sisters and I grew up as children.
Of course only on weekends as we school on weekdays.
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The last time we were up there was about 10 years ago. Or maybe more.
So being there again after so long, the rush of memories almost knocked me over.
Only this time, I'm not there as a little girl anymore.
But as a mummy sharing her childhood with her daughter.

Dickhead

A week of drama.

Maid's husband left her for another woman.

Of course she's an emotional wreck.

Who wouldn't be?

Here she is, working her ass off so that she can support you and your son and what do you do?

You run off with the first woman you see.

You think she wants to come here and work as a maid?

She's only doing that because her old job back in her own country wasn't paying enough.

And you weren't doing what you were suppose to be - supporting her!

Men.

So stupid.

Useless, freaking, ungrateful, brainless jerks who only think with their dicks.

Got brains for what?

Oh yah, forgot, you're brainless.

And because of you and your dickhead, I lost a whole night's worth of sleep.

Like LITERALLY a whole night, okay!

I had to stay up till 6am to console your grieving wife.

Whatever.

She's better off without you.

Thank goodness for her, I'm a good Ma'am.

And thank goodness for me, we're going away for a little weekend holiday tomorrow.

Hubby Turns 31

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We were originally supposed to celebrate at Tamarind Hills but I think staying home everyday with nothing to do made me forget that there is still a whole world of people still hustling and bustling about, working hard, using up every precious minute they have and only occasionally stealing a little time here and there to rest a bit. And so, because I forgot about that little detail, I took for granted that I wouldn't need to make a reservation and so, I got lazy.

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I also totally forgot that it was Ramadhan month. Stupid.

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And so, by the time I actually called Tamarind Hills, it was already full. And so was Tamarind Springs. So, no choice la, we ended up in Sri Ayuthaya - again.

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Even then, we had to wait for our table. And it wasn't like as if I did not make a reservation. I did. And they had the cheek to ask me if I wanted to sit downstairs, like where all the other outcasts-who-didn't-make-reservations were booted to. Of course not!

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So stupid.

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Just because they have a little more customers than normal and they cannot handle.

Of course I got upset lah.

Lucky for them, I love their food. So I would never boycott them. My lost.

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But I didn't stay upset for long cause they found us a nice little table at a corner. And that's also because I told them off.

Hubby said, "Gone la, now our food's gonna have extra ingredients on it".

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Well, whatever it was, it still tasted good.

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Happy 31st Birthday, Darling!

Simply Me

I guess I'm kindda like having my own little 'Merdeka' celebration. You know, a new blog. New layout. New me.

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I've never really admitted to it but I've been in self-denial eversince I got pregnant with Renee. I didn't want to acknowledge the fact that I was no longer who I used to be and the fact that I got upset whenever someone told me that 'I looked like a mother', that says it all. The fact was, and still is, is that I AM a mother.

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But today, I'm shouting it out loud that I AM a mother and I AM proud of it.

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Yes, I do miss my partying days where I could be out all night drinking myself senseless.

I miss the times when I could just dash out of the house for a quick shopping spree without worrying about anything or anyone else.

I miss the hours and hours I used to spend by the beach, soaking up the sand, with nothing else in mind.

I miss my freedom.

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But then, I found a new kind of freedom.

The freedom of being a mother.

And this is who I am now.